A Love Letter from God to His Daughters

It’s been awhile since I’ve blogged about anything in my life and though t it was time to be honest and vent out some of what I’ve been feeling. 

It’s not easy to be in your early 40’s and single, especially when most of my friends are married or have significant others to share in their lives.  I’ve been honored and blessed to have awesome friends and family who have been by my side through it all…thank you!  I love you!

I’ve learned that no matter how people treat me it’s not up to me how they feel about me or how they are feeling, it’s up to me how I react and what I do with it.  I need to begin to lean on Christ again for strength through each and every day.  I hope you will pray with me that as I find my way I continue to seek Christ to provide me with the strength that only he can provide…

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. ~2 Cor 12:9

I found the following poem online today and it lifted my spirits.  I hope as you read it you will also find the encouragement I found!

Love ya…mean it,

Robyn

My Precious Daughter (A love letter from God to His Daughters)

My precious daughter, I will never leave you, I will never forsake you, I will be faithful until the end, You are more than just “my daughter “You are my princess, My beloved, my delight, I rejoice in you, You are beautiful, You shine with light, You have dove's eyes, I rejoice in you with singing, I will quiet you with my love, Hold you in my arms, Never let you go, For you are never alone, You never have been alone, I've been with you all along, Your whole life,

I understand your pain, My sacrifice wasn't for nothing, Let me tell you I understand your confusion, I understand your anger and frustration, I understand your tears, And I care, Very much, For you, Everything that is important to you, Is important to me too, My love for you will never end, I will not leave you for another, I will not abandon you ever, No matter how far you go, My love will never end.

I have examined you heart, I know everything about you, When you sit down or stand up, I know your thoughts, Even when you are far away, I see you when you travel, Or when you rest at home, I see the tears that fall from your eyes, I see the heartache in your home, Believe me I know the lies, I know the temptations, But I am here, I know what you are going to say, Even before you say it. I go before you and follow, I place my hand of blessing on your head, such knowledge is beyond comprehension, it is too wonderful for you to understand, you can never escape from my Spirit, and you can never get away from my presence! If you go up to heaven, I am there; if you go down to the grave, I am there. If you ride the wings of the morning, if you dwell by the farthest oceans, even there my hand will guide you and my strength will support you.

You could ask the darkness to hide you, And the light around you to become night, But even in darkness you cannot hide from me, To me night shine as day, I made all the delicate, inner parts of your body, I made your heart, I know what makes you hurt, I know what makes you cry, I know what makes you tick, I know when breaks your heart the most, And I know how to comfort you, I know how to make you smile, I know how to love you, I know how to be a daddy who loves, Such a beautiful daughter like you, You long for acceptance, When you were already accepted into my family, You are fearfully and wonderfully made, I love you more than you know, I will fill your heart with the love and peace you long for, I saw you before you were born, I knit you together in your mother's womb, Even then I loved you, And I was proud of you, And I thought of you as my beautiful daughter, my princess, Every day of your life is recorded in my book, Every moment was laid out, Every moment that would bring you joy, Every moment that would bring you pain.

My thoughts about you are precious, They cannot be numbered, They outnumber the grains of sand, And when you wake up in the morning, I am still with you, I love you more than you know, You are beautiful to me, Even though you feel something is always wrong, Just look into my eyes, See how I see you, A beautiful princess, With beautiful eyes that shine with my love and my light, I love you, And I will say it again, I love you, My princess, my beloved, My precious daughter,

I love you, I love you, and I love you.

Don't give up, For I see the brokenness in your families, In your friendships, I see the pain in your eyes, Your beautiful heart, That used to be so filled joy, Is now crushed beneath your burdens, But you're still beautiful to memos beautiful to me, I will heal you and restore you once again,

My precious daughter, I will never leave you, I will never forsake you, and I will be faithful until the end,

Faithful until the end…
Your loving Father and Daddy, Abba Prince of Peace, King of Glory

Lean not on your own understanding

"Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.” -- Proverbs 3:5

It’s been awhile since I’ve blogged last. This blog may be a bit of a downer; however, it’s the way I am feeling at the moment. There has been a lot going on in my life, which I will not be sharing all of it with you; however, just to say that I do not understand why there are things in your life where you suffer and the reason is unknown. I have not been the best to communicate with the Lord in regard to what I am feeling and am angry at the moment that there is no reason for the result of my situation. I do; however, want to say that without His grace I would be lost completely. I hope to have someone read this and understand that believers in Christ also go through tough times but its how we handle them that make the difference. I’ve been trying to be a shining light during my season in life, but it’s not easy. I’m beyond blessed to have a family and some great friends that love me without judgment. I’ve not told many people about what is going on with my life because I am afraid of the judgment that comes with it. I am certain people mean well; however, my Lord is the ONLY ONE who can pass judgment. With that said, I am hoping that those who read this understand there are trails in our lives and seasons. I am going through a season and praying the Lord brings me through it a better person.

I asked my sweet friend Emma to be a guest blogger for me. I am so proud to see the way the Lord is growing her and of the woman, she has become! I have great respect for her and how she always speaks from the heart, without fear. I am learning to share my heart more and more and allowing the Lord to use my blogs to touch someone who reads it. Thank you sweet Emma for being willing to be my guest blogger! You are very special to me and very proud to have you in my life! xoxo

Sometimes when I pray, I like to imagine that I'm kneeling at the foot of the cross while Christ is still hanging there. Although slightly morbid, I think in the times I do that- it's out of guilt. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed that I helped put Him there. And I think by using that imagery I try to scare myself into behaving.

One day when I shared that with a professor and he said, "That's interesting. But have you ever tried imagining Christ risen and seated at the right hand of God?"...and honestly, I hadn't.

I realized that I spend a lot of time "looking backward." I haven't quite gotten over my sin. I spend a lot of time feeling remorseful. I constantly find myself forcing myself to think about things I have done and how it made me feel so sad and miserable so as not to let history repeat itself (even when it's so tempting). That I constantly make my sin out to be so terribly awful, the end all be all. And that the more aware I become of my sin- the more filthy it becomes.

By doing that I constantly leave Christ in the grave. 

This weekend we sang "Jesus Paid it All" and again I was reminded of my tendency to do this when we sang, "Sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow." Sin HAD left a crimson stain. But it doesn't stop there. He also WASHED IT WHITE AS SNOW.

This is a struggle for me and I haven't quite overcome it- but I spend more time dwelling on the past, thinking, "What if this," "What if that," instead of, "It is finished."

I want to let go of the past. I want to run my race and not look back because what is in front of me is so thrilling. It is the kingdom of Christ! How am I to delight in, rejoice in, and truly anticipate that if I'm looking backward? Don't your odds of stumbling and falling generally increase if you run looking behind you?

I can't wonder what could have been or continue to tie myself down. Because Christ has risen and I have been set free. 

"...whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things." Philippians 4:8

I am whole. I am healthy. I am right where Christ wants me to be. I am looking forward and I will fight the fight and finish my race.

Ah....Fall!!!!!

To Every Thing, There is a Season - Ecclesiastes 3. 1-8

To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

Fall is one of my favorite seasons. I am so happy to finally be able to wear sweaters and have the air conditioning off. I know I'm not alone. It's time for bonfires, corn mazes, and long walks at John Bryant Park. I need to be honest. I have been struggling to bring joy to all I do. I've been stuck in a season. I've not been faithfully in the Word, nor have I been praying. Pastor Rob's teaching on Sunday morning has been on my mind all week. Christ challenged the woman in regard to her religious assumptions, exposed her sin, and Christ offered Himself. Isn't it so like Christ to show us who He is in all we do? The water of Jesus is a gift, living, ever satisfying, and internal and external spring. This week has been a struggle for me. I've been emotionally and physically tired and have not been in the best of moods. My HC quad was so great and they embraces me and loves me regardless of my mood. I love these women so much! They know exactly what to say to remind me of Christ's love and that there is no condemnation. Christ is the living water I need and should be drinking of this water. As Jason said the previous week, I am the broken jar, but my light should be shining through that brokenness. Sheila Smith reminded me that although we are in a season of pain, Christ has His hands all over the situation and works through us to bring the light to those who do not know him. I love her so much! She has been an encouragement to me! Sheila is in my HC family and she has shown so much love to us even though she is in pain! I want to be like her. Work through the pain and love on people, and that does include me. I am so blessed to have friends and family in my life who do not allow me to wallow in my self-pity and show me that I'm loved regardless of what mood or state of mind I'm in. So regardless of which season you are in, trust the Lord to walk with you through the mist of it! Hang on to the love of God!!!!!!

New Job

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

It was a long four weeks of training; however, I met some really great people, a few are lifelong friends in the making. I know the Lord has great things in store for me at The Berry Company and know He has put me here for a reason. Maybe it's to be there for new friends or just to be and show His love through me. I have been really exhausted the past month of working and trying to get used to working again. Being in the corporate world after being off for two and a half years is not easy. I'm struggling with how to balance life and work. Poor Sadie, she is being such a good girl, I know she's going through a big adjustment as well. I am so thankful for great friends and family who love me through this adjustment. There have been some emotional moments and some fun moments. 

 The friends I've made at work so far have been great. I keep in touch with Melissa most. She and I have a lot in common and clicked right away. I would not have made it through the training without her. :O) There are others who made training especially fun, Richard in particular, but so happy it's finally finished and now on my own. Technically I'm still in training for additional 12 weeks, but it's so nice to be able to work on my own and adjust to my own style. The picture above is the entire training class and the trainers. 

The Lord is teaching me to be patient with myself and not be too quick to judge others. To be honest, I have had my moments that were not glorifying to the Lord and I've not been very careful with my mouth. I want to be the witness the Lord wants me to be and I could use additional prayer to help me be what the Lord wants me to be. I want the Lord to shine through my actions and sometimes my actions, although not bad, are not glorifying. I should be doing everything to the glory of God. I'm struggling but I'm trying harder. The Lord is so good and just to protect and be there for His people. I am going to do whatever it takes to do everything to the glory of the Lord. Much love to you all, Robyn :O)

First Two Weeks of Training

Well, it's been two weeks of training at my new job and I'm exhausted. Although it's great to be back in the corporate world, it's harder than I thought it would be to get back into the swing of things. It doesn't help that I have two dogs this week. :O) It's something to get used to as well. God has blessed me beyond my imagination and there are times of amazement at His wonders. He is so faithful to those who wait on Him. It's all in His timing. He has tested me in my patience as well as shown me that if I am faithful and trust in His will, He will reveal a little of what He has in store. I'm waiting for what is in store for me in regard to my new job as well as how He will use me. I have met many new friends, but there are a few that I've really connected with. I have made lifelong friends. I am excited to continue to get to know them. I have a couple of new places to visit. :O) 

I am looking forward to seeing how the Lord uses these friendships. I am faithful He will reveal how I am to honor Him in these relationships. I am so thankful to my family and friends for their support during my transition into the working class. I have not been around much and they have loved me through this and I'm eternally grateful. I love them so much! :O) I am continuing to pray the Lord helps me to retain what I am learning in my new job and that once I have completed training I am able to apply what I've learned and done a fantastic job! I am at this company for a reason and I'm going to do my best to honor the Lord in all I do. 

“And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” – Phil 4:19

First I am so thankful for my sweet friend Emma for helping me make my blog look so much better! Thank you so much! I love you girl!!!!!!! I am sorry It's been a while since my blog. So much has happened. I have finally landed a job. After 2 1/2 years, I have a job. I will be working at The Berry Company as a Client Account Manager. My first day is the 19th of July! The Lord has been so good and faithful. I would not have made it through this transition in my life without my faith in the Lord. God is so good! 

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 

I did not know what my future held, but I had to hold on to my Lord and trust His plan was much better than my own. I may not understand why it took this long to get a job; however, I have to come to the understanding, it is not for me to know. 

My relationship with the Lord grew during this time. I had to trust in Him, since I had no other choice. My friend Sheila is going through I tough time with chemo for her lung cancer, and she said something tonight that touched me. She was discussing how sick the chemo is making her, she said all she could do was think of her head on the Lamb's lap and He is rubbing her head saying He is with her. How awesome is that. She has not wavered in her faith and during this rough time, she is continuing to trust the Lord will bring her through. She is so strong. I have not right to complain about a single thing. I am healthy and have not had to suffer for anything. Praise the Lord for that! The Lord will bring her through this because of her faith and trust, just He has brought me through this trail. I am truly blessed. I have great friends, who have been beside me through this time in my life and have stepped up to be that support and encouragement I've needed. 

There have been many times where some of my friends did not understand but they were there to listen and be the support I needed. My house church family has been awesome!!!! Although I've struggled to find my place with in the house church, I've learned to trust they are there for me to stand behind me through thick and thin. To my special peeps in my old and new quad.....I love them so much and have been blessed to have women of God who are willing to call me out on things, so deserving, and love on me when I needed it the most. My family has been unbelievable. I can not put into words my love for them nor can I say how much I appreciate the support and love they have shown me. I have the best family. :) I have a new friend in my house. She is a nine year old black lab named Sadie. She has been fun to have around. It's nice to have her here when I come home to. I have had her for a couple of months, and although we had a rough start, I think we've found our grove and she's here to stay. Sorry such a long blog, but much to say! I am thankful to have great friends and family! God is good and is teaching me things each and every day about myself. I am stronger than I thought I was!